The Nightmare Continues

J wasn't lying. He was there today.

With little-miss-bare-midrift.

While they actually changed partners this time. He did wait through the girls only class for her. When I asked him if I would see him that night at the dance he said yeah. bla bla bla I'm going to answer you in one syllables bla bla and be a general jackass bla bla because little-miss is stretching on the floor next to me bla.

I was pissed. To say the least. I make an attempt to be at least friendly and get the cold shoulder.

I was pissed that he was going to be at the dance. I was counting on him being out of town. (Turns out, I asked him about it later, he told one of his students he was going to be out of town so he come to this stuff instead. Jerk.) I had picked out something really nice to wear and now was kind of regretting it. Apparently though, as one dancer (who has a girlfriend actually) that my short skirt from a couple of saturdays ago was a big hit. So maybe I'll go back to that one.

I was on my way to talk to CF (Class Friend) when J intercepted and asked me to dance. After one song I said thanks and went to dance with somone else. BareMidriftGirl was still dancing with Italian Boy so J sat down in a strop. It was fantastic! Italian Boy kept BMG for like 4 songs. And when she finally made it back to the seats J walked off to ask someone else to dance so BMG sat there in a strop. I was having a good giggle. When finally J was done dancing with other people he went looking for BMG and I intercepted and asked him to dance. Ha! They eventually made up and did dance together, but it was fun while it lasted. She got stroppy again when he said he was leaving at 8:30. I was glad to see them not leave together. She stayed until the end. I left a little before then.

I think I actually got J's last dance which was kind of nice. And he stood with me to watch the performances. During the last dance with him though I thought to myself, "why am I doing this to myself?" We could dance and say hi to each other and just he can just be someone I used to sleep with. I thought of it as passing the torch. "here take him, he's yours" I mentally thought to BMG. I even was planning on going back to his club on Friday and his Tuesday class.

The good will feelings made it all the way to my car. Then I started feeling crappy again. The endorphins of dancing just didn't make last long enough. I think I am not going back to dance at his on Friday or any other Fridays or going back to his class.

I'm still of two minds about ending it with him. As in, telling him it's over and why vs. letting it fizzle.

I feel like BMG is another incarnation of PSSG (Pink Sweat Suit Girl). I am wondering if he is grooming her to be his new partner for performances at the club. It's odd though. That he wants to dance with these girls who really know what they are doing because they are actual dancers. But J is by no means near professional quality. He's been doing this for 3 years. He's a little better at it than some because he was an athlete first. But watching him with his current partner at his club there is such a clear difference between them. Personally I don't think she's a fluid enough dancer for this style. But she can do the splits, as can BMG, so there it is.

I actually broke down and skimmed through the "essential" (i.e. short version) Mars & Venus. It says that women do this silence test to see if a man will meet her needs and if he doesn't he fails, but that she should just ask. That a man won't do anything unless she does. And after she does then she's supposed to be silent. Part of me thinks if I say something now I'll be automatically rejected because of the presence of BMG. But I don't want to wait until I hear that she's his girlfriend.

Maybe I shouldn't be trusting a book. Because we're not in a relationship. If he wanted to ask me out he would have. If he wanted to catch a fast food lunch with me he would have asked. (Of course I got that bit of wisdom from He's just not that into you also a book.)